As the summer came to a close, I found myself in the same position I was in three years ago: searching for a new home. Over those years, I had explored nearly 40 cities, analyzing their pros and cons while real estate prices soared across the country. What once felt like a privilege — the freedom to choose where to live — had turned into a daunting task. Yet, I was determined to find the right place.

For many adults, the choice of home is closely linked to employment. Our first apartment post-college was in the city where my husband secured a job. Our subsequent moves were dictated by job relocations. This pattern continued until we both transitioned to remote work five years ago, which radically changed our outlook on possibilities. Suddenly, we had the freedom to live anywhere in the U.S. But which city would be our new home?

This marked the beginning of a prolonged quest to identify the perfect city, a journey filled with both hope and frustration. I wasn’t alone in this pursuit; online searches for the “best city in the U.S.” surged recently, reflecting the trend of remote work. Numerous websites like Livability, Money, Niche, and Rocket Homes compiled annual lists of top cities for relocation, offering data-driven insights that I perused with zeal, diving into bustling lists touting cities like Covington, Kentucky, and Boulder, Colorado. I even explored targeted lists for families and young professionals, convinced that the key to my dilemma lay just one click away.

My criteria were straightforward: affordability, diversity, pleasant weather, low crime rates, ample parks, and strong job markets. It seemed like a reasonable checklist. Yet, after three years of searching, nothing had outshined the place we were calling home. Based in Tampa — a city frequently showcased on those “best city” lists — I struggled to articulate why I wanted to leave. Every glance out my window at those palm trees felt like a reminder that I was stuck in an endless summer postcard.

Tampa offered a vibrant food scene, sunny weather year-round, and no state income tax, making it an appealing destination. Still, it never felt like home, reminiscent of a relationship that checks all the right boxes but lacks the spark. Every year, I confidently declared, “This will be the year we move,” yet each time, I renewed our lease. I traveled to bustling cities in Washington, explored cost-effective locales in Indiana and Ohio, visited vibrant areas in Tennessee and Georgia, and even scoured every major city in Florida. Nothing resonated.

In a moment of spontaneity, we decided to visit Raleigh, North Carolina, last November for a weekend getaway. I was there to scout for a story but quickly fell in love with the vibrant fall colors and the local cuisine. As we strolled through the crisp autumn air, I sensed I had finally discovered “home.” We made the move to Raleigh that spring.

Raleigh has proved to be the ideal balance of characteristics: not overwhelmingly large or small and situated conveniently between mountains and the coast. It is a diverse and progressive area, bordered by charming towns and picturesque farmland. While it does have its challenges — notably hot, humid summers and higher taxes compared to Florida — the overall blend of elements was precisely what we sought.

Finally, I can’t credit our move solely to meticulous research, even though I analyzed various statistics like housing prices and crime rates. Raleigh ranks sixth in the latest U.S. News & World Report’s “Best Places to Live,” but the decision transcended mere numbers. It encompassed experiences and emotions: sunflower fields, a local university that produces its own ice cream, and the picturesque drive past grazing horses en route to downtown. Bid farewell to the relentless palm trees and embrace the graceful oaks that give Raleigh its nickname: the City of Oaks.

While Raleigh may not be flawless, it is undeniably perfect for us at this moment in time — and that is what truly matters.